Apparently when it comes to a happy marriage, size does matter. A new study reveals the thinner the wife, the happier the marriage. Researchers claim marital bliss is experienced most often when the wife is smaller than the husband, even if just by a fraction of an ounce or even a gram. The researchers did admit however, that their findings reflected a difference in priorities in men and woman. Their conclusion was a partner`s size was more important to the man than to the woman. So the theory is a woman should seek out a man larger than herself and the couple will live happily ever after. If that’s the secret I’m so screwed.
Next researchers hope to discover a spousal satisfaction equivalent factor. Something in the “blissful” marriage that women tend to care about more than men. I would like to save the researchers some time and money and offer up some satisfaction factors of my own.
Let’s start with the obvious. Women have no problem asking for directions. Man’s refusal to do so has lead to the invention of the gps and Mapquest. Women prefer men who own and operate these devices. Women also prefer men who routinely place the toilet seat back down after using and replace the toilet paper roll when empty. A woman will select a man with more facial hair unless of course the woman happens to be the bearded lady in the Ringling Brother’s Barnum and Bailey Circus, then it becomes a bonafide occupational requirement.
It helps if the couple share some common interests of course. If one is a Patriots fan and the other a Colts fan the marriage is doomed.
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